Cereal monogamy

By nature, I’m a fairly faithful kinda gal. I’ve devoted myself wholly to one breakfast companion at a time before moving on. And here, in a cardboard box and with added niacin, is the story of my life so far.

So first it was Ricicles, but that’s only really because I had a huge crush on Noddy, their front man at the time.

And, honestly, can you blame me? You can keep David Tenant and his tardis. Give me Noddy and his little yellow car anytime.

Then I think is was Frosties. Because, obviously, they’re greeeeeeat!

Was his nose always blue? I never noticed that before.

Then we probably had the masochistic Special K years – too dull to illustrate but it’s still going strong. Next, I went all whole food and organic.

I even used to make my own – using a recipe from The Enchanted Broccoli Forest and ingredients from Neal’s Yard, carefully lugged home on the 137 from Oxford Circus. Ah me! Hippy days. That lasted quite a while. In fact, probably until I had my first tooth crowned.

When the twins were smaller, I mostly finished up fag ends of slightly stale and bizarrely named chocolately cereals bought purely because of the free gifts.

But now that they’re older, and eat more or less the same stuff as humans, I can please myself again. And the market has moved on to accomodate people like me, who like to pretend they’re being health-conscious while indulging themselves hugely at the same time. So now it’s …

… not just cereal, it’s M&S Triple Chocolate Crunch with wholegrain crunchy clusters and curls of plain, milk and white chocolate.



24 thoughts on “Cereal monogamy

  1. My one healthy dietary habit is eating sultana bran. Have done ever since I was about seven … I think it’s why I’m still alive as nothing green ever passed my lips until I was, um, 28 …

  2. “now that they’re older, and eat more or less the same stuff as humans,”
    You are so funny.

    I’m still stuck in the latent hippy phase and make my own granola. Like Steph, my kids get only the boring kinds of cereal and think that porridge is a treat because they are permitted to add brown sugar. Buckets of brown sugar.

  3. my twins are still of a free gift/cocopop eating age but the little squirts are enjoying an entirely unforseen porridge revival

    very disappointing

    i live in hope (and continue to buy cheerios…that i eat…so they don’t go stale)

  4. the children have just bought daddy breakfast in bed: toast on wholemeal, natch and muesli. they also gave him the best dad’s handbook, in which he read that in 1907 breakfast in beds would consist of:eggs, bacon, kippers, cholestrol, whereas today… Let’s just say it described his breakfast down to a t!

  5. I don’t care what anybody says: I LIKE Special-K. And Bran Flakes. And I don’t add no sugar neither.

    However, I do draw the line at All-Bran which is akin to eating twigs.

  6. the worst…grape nuts. ew. ew. ew.

    i hate sugary cereals. my fav of all time is plain cheerios. my husband can’t stand them. he goes for the cocoa puffs or fruit loops or anything guaranteed to rot your teeth (ha! now i sound like a real mom!)

  7. I like the supermarket own-brand names for cereal where they can’t use the real name so use something close-ish resulting in such delights as chocco crisps, honey nut flakes of corn and the frankly disturbing multi-grain boulders. (no idea what they’re supposed to be)

  8. Rofl @ the Special K comment. It’s one of those cereals….you know you should cause it’s healthy for you but darn…..you really want something full of sugar and chocolate instead! Hmmmmm…sounds like my dilemna. That’s when I usually toast some bread instead and have good ol’ Aussie Vegemite toast!

  9. yabbut…i recently read the back of the packets to discovered that spec k has quite a bit more sugar (and exactly the same amount of sat fat) than cornflakes, which are much nicer


  10. You are missing out. Breakfast cereal should be layered! The basic package would have Weetabix or Shreddies as a bottom layer crowned with something disgustingly sugary (Golden Nuggets or Country Crisp). Once you have mastered the basics, greater elaboration is possible. Try substituting Hagelslag (dutch hundreds amnd thousands) for sugar … mmm.

  11. I resisted the monogamy for so long … I would force myself to alternate days between my favourite cereal and various other inferior contenders. Then, a couple of years ago, I just gave in and now it’s Life Multigrain every morning, with no shame.

  12. oh dear! i’ve been slack and not responded to a single comment. how rude of me.
    dis i’m actually more disturbed by the idea of a 7-year-old eating sultana bran than i am by a 27-year-old not eating green stuff. i’m terribly old, but i wouldn’t eat sultana bran. yuk yuk yuk!
    eddie waring (now there’s a name i’ve not hear in a while – along with freddie laker – what happened to him?). toast is fab (provided it’s not actually toast, but warm bread that doesn’t make a noise when it’s buttered … sorry, long story), but ‘toast monogamy’ doesn’t work so well as a title. and i’m all about smartarsed titles, me
    flutter soz! alphadogma chided me gently a little while ago for banging on about food all the time. i thought she was exaggerating … but really, she wasn’t, was she?
    steph cheerios mmmmm *wanders off to larder hopefully*. yes – noddy – oh for a nice agreeable man with a lovely yellow car. (looks like my crush is intact, after all these years)
    alf you were perfectly right – i do only talk about food – oh, and i’ve started a religious phase too. i should get out more. porridge mmmmm *wanders off to larder hopefully again*
    violet yes, i did sort of know that, but it’s all a great big con so we can pretend to be eating healthily while still totally indulging ourselves – and i’m all for that!
    urbane that is the sad duty of a mother – to eat up all the yummy stuff bought for the children and that she’s managed to hide on a high shelf so they never even saw it. even more so for mothers of twins. we must stick together!
    jane poor old daddy. my husband would like to live as an edwardian too. or maybe as a truck driver, subsisting entirely on greasy spoon fare. tragic …

  13. I’ve never really put that much thought into cereal, but you know what? you’re right. I’m a cereal slut! What ever is on sale, that’s what I buy. No loyalty whatsoever….wow.

    You’ve got me all giddy now….I’ve never been unfaithful before and now, after I realized how much of a cereal tramp I am, I feel truly dirty.


  14. deep breath
    steve you’re tough, you are! all bran is made of twigs. not a lot of people know that.
    mangonel too right – three kinds of chocolate to worry about. but i’m highly qualified – you can leave it to me …
    ydm grape nuts not only taste horrid, they kind of get stuck round your teeth – not a good look. we don’t get plain cheerios here, so i just have to soldier on with the sugary type. *sigh*
    steve yeah – gravel or the kind of little rocky bits birds have in their crops to grind stuff up. not edible, that’s for sure
    bootsie don’t you pirates eat hard tack with weevils? that would be similar to grapenuts, probably
    billy yes – i bet they sit round a big conference table, all earnest, and talk about concepts and mouth-feel. what a job! who do you think makes up the names for paint colours? must blog about that one of these days
    brissiemum vegemite! *long, dramatic shudder* i’ll see if an emergency shipment of triple choc is possible. you need it, woman!
    urban this is the kind of essential fact finding we need. even if it’s completely bogus (which i’m sure it isn’t!)
    moobs respect! i’ve only ever met one other nuttter highly discerning person like you before. you need to blog about this – get it out into the open (for others to take the mickey)
    bub i think it’s probably ok to have an open breakfast – as long as you’re true to yourself.
    mel now i see why i was instantly attracted to it!
    laisi you could always be like moobs and have multiple cereals! saucy, eh?

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