Sliced bread! It’s the best thing since … er …

So what did people say before sliced bread was discovered? Wikipedia informs that sliced bread was first produced in 1928, or something. But it doesn’t reveal what the bench mark of perfection and ingenuity and all that is honest and decent was prior to the invention of the slicing machine.
I’d very much like to hear your nominations so post below, or send them, on a slice of warm toast, preferably special delivery, in an insulated envelope, because my heating has packed up and I’m bloody freezing!
That’s all, folks!
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18 thoughts on “Sliced bread! It’s the best thing since … er …

  1. Yes and I should like to add arsenic treatment as this apparently cured the pox a long time ago, which was pretty useful. Again, not that great on toast.

    It’s lovely to find this blog, and I will be checking back regularly, to see how barking you are. 🙂

    I remember when you were researching your book with tips for mums – I helped a tiny, tiny bit on behalf of Tamba.

    I’ll add you to my blog roll this minute and hope you can drop by to say hello on my blog which blathers on about twins etc,

    best wishes

  2. Oh, I know this one. Back in the seventeenth century, it was common for people to say: “That’s the best thing since the merkin.” (For those not in the know, a merkin is a pubic wig, worn by prostitutes after shaving their genitalia to eliminate lice or to disguise the marks of syphilis).

  3. Wow – that’s really interesting. It’s a bit like Call My Bluff or Ask The Family with Robert Robertson on here today isn’t it?

  4. I love RYE bread with caraway seeds! But since there are no good bakeries here I can’t find any! Since I’ve been back to the States I need to get my rye bread fix!!

  5. How can I top a merkin?
    That sounds like a great joke that involves 5 popes, a rabbi, a clown car, and a light bulb…and I’m going to leave it up to the most clever Emma K to come up with the punchline. Cos she is so funny!
    Now I need to go find myself one of those donuts you recommended.

  6. Bob Monkhouse once asked where the bloke who invented the drawing board went back to before he finally managed to invent the drawing board.

    I quite liked that.

  7. Ooo-ooo, how about the invention of the guillotine?
    They could have said, “That’s the greatest thing since sliced heads.”

  8. Why did you mention bread? There’s a loaf of banana bread in the kitchen and I’m trying not to eat it.

    Hurry up and get your book sold in America so I can read it!!!! 🙂

  9. We lived in England the summer I was 17 and my siblings and I begged the local bakery to bake us fresh rye bread and your post is making me think of that.

    I wish I could send you some of our sunshine in an envelope. It was one of those glorious blue sky warm spring days here today. I wanted to teach all my classes outside.

  10. rocky excellent suggestion – the sine qua non, in fact. and, thanks, i’ll pass on the crap toast – rather stick with hummous!
    linda toast with arsenic – again, it’s not quite doing it for me. i’m one of those fussy eaters, like on the telly.
    emma baggsie you be on my quiz team next time. are you any good on sport?
    rocky i was just thinking the same thing. you get a better class of nonesense on this blog, i feel!
    mrsmogul i’ll have to send a care package. many of your fellow citizens feel thay can’t survive without choccie hobnobs either. nice to know britain reigns supreme in the biscuit department, at least.
    alpha you’re right – that’s begging for a punchline. ooer missus – everything sounds suggestive now (or is that just me?)
    robin that’s a good one. old bob was funnier than i ever gave him credit for – as i found when i watched all those docos after he died. too late, alas!
    denguy nice one! i wonder if that inspired the inventor of the bread slicing machine …
    marmite (superb soubriquet, btw) i don’t think it will ever be sold in the us – it barely sold here! we’re having a meeting about a p/b next week – i’ll keep you posted.
    pundit he’s good, isn’t he? i’ve added him to my list already.
    kate some sunshine would be very welcome. it’s been ok today – but ooooo the rain over the last couple of weeks! i may be washed away at any moment …

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