Food fights – a war of nutrition

There was a very interesting programme on tv tonight – with which I was completely unconnected. It was all about food. What a rich seam of lunacy the producers uncovered. I’d love to do a post about it, I really would. But since I didn’t have the correct brand of pesto available, i’m having to make an emergency toastie for the one that won’t eat bolognese, so I’ll get back to you tomorrow.

Until then – feast your eyes on this sinister character. Would you eat him? No, I didn’t think so.

Broccoli is scary.


35 thoughts on “Food fights – a war of nutrition

  1. Blimey – that would give an adult nightmares let alone a child that wasn’t that keen on vegetables. Surely it’s better just to try stuff as it is? Children know when food is dressed up in order to make it palatable and generally reject it if it has been ‘disguised’.

  2. I’m kicking myself that I live in Germany so I can’t watch “The Madness” – when is it coming out on DVD?

    As for scary food, I think that’s taking the brocoli tree one step too far. My kids like their broc, without me ever having to mention its tree-ish-ness. I also refuse to make faces out of food. If they want to play games with carrot strips, fine, but I’m not going to.

  3. Yes – I agree – isn’t that why they invented alphabetti spaghetti and jammy dodgers which are the only 2 concessions I make occasionally. Stigmatising anything and making it into something else is just a rod for anyone’s back. My general rule of thumb is try it, eat it, eat what you can – there isn’t an alternative I’m afraid and if you are really starving because you ate hardly any supper then a banana and big cup of warm milk before bed!

  4. I was listening to the radio yesterday, and someone said they rip the stalks of broccoli in the supermarket, so they don’t have to pay as much when the damn stuff’s weighed.

    Now that’s downright terrifying.

  5. I’m semi-embarrassed to go shopping with my two because they stand in the trolley chorusing “can we have broccoli? Pleeeeease?” And I just know that everyone thinks I’ve coached them to say it…

    As long as it doesn’t involve tomatoes, which I can kind of understand, they’ll eat pretty much whatever’s going. 🙂

  6. ginga i think you may be the first person in the history of the world to use the term ‘broc-fro’. fantastic!
    beck and charlotte actually, i don’t know why broccoli gets such a bad press – my kids have always eaten it. but cauliflower! they won’t touch it – yet isn’t it just the same only without the sun tan? i don’t get it! (and i think that’s probably the point)
    rock you’re so right! on the rare occasions when i’ve given into capricious eating, the kids have ended up kind of out of synch with mealtimes – very tiresome. bananas are perfect for those moments – or toast. i’m getting hungry now …
    100words no wonder the little broccoli man looks so freaked out
    lqs admit it – you bribe them with jaffa cakes, don’t you? my son won’t eat tomatoes or cheese on their own, yet would live on pizza forever. maybe it’s a texture thing …

  7. I pride myself on my ability to smuggle vegetables into my children’s food: casseroles, soups, risottos all get a good helping each. Still haven’t persuaded either of them to eat Broccoli yet though, and this picture is not going to persuade them, methinks. (I have sympathy with la-que-sabe: my son asks for mussels when we are in Morrisons. I feel so unremittingly middle class.)

  8. That’s a scandalous accusation! Unfortunately, it might be true other than the fact that my daughter doesn’t like Jaffa Cakes. Or rather, she only likes the chocolate part. Cue endlessly sticky paws and the inevitable bits of soggy sponge biscuit that one tends to find down the back of the sofa a week later. Mmm, niiiice…

  9. otj actually, it should be rated 15 – the blair witch broccoli!
    ds well ketchup’s supposed to be a superfood, isn’t it? (or is this another one of my jaffacake-type fantasies? yeah – and chocolate is actually a slimming food.
    missy hope i haven’t given you nightmares. for god’s sake, do yerself a favour and never watch snow white. those trees! brrrrr
    100words it can’t be real – can it? i keep staring at it hoping for a caterpillar to pop its head out. the bowling ball theory would explain my lamentable skills, though. next time i go to superbowl i’ll use a turnip (times are hard!)
    pundit it’s that menacing look in its eyes … what am i saying. broccoli doesn’t really have eyes … does it?!
    ms m verrrrry cunning. my two eschew mussels, but i got them to eat squid rings by telling them they were deep fried rubber bands. hmmmmm

  10. My wife is obsessed with Broccoli and Cauliflower (or Fartyflower as it is known in my house) We have one or both of them with every dinner. By the time we are done we are able to float ustairs to be like fleshy weather balloons

  11. Deep fried rubber bands – hmm, I’m going to try that.

    Oddly enough, broccoli is one of the few vegetables that Dexter will eat without fail. Actually, it’s the only one – result, though!

  12. I once got a very picky child to eat cauliflower by pointing out it looked like brains.

    Of course I won’t touch the stuff my self. I was insanely picky as a child. And look at me now. Er.

  13. According to my son, HP sauce is very good with broccoli. My husband thinks this is in bad taste. My daughter thinks broccoli is in bad taste. Luckily, she is into anything that comes out of my juicer, so I put broccoli stalks in the juicer together with pineapple. That fooled her…

    By the way, there was a question in the Guardian ‘Notes and Queries’ this week about brocolli and ketchup… is this some zeitgeisty thing?

    P.S. Will let you know about the Pullman… I guess your theory is that the third book always lets it down…?

  14. Broccoli is green isn’t it? That means “do not pass go, do not collect $200” in our house. Only orange, white and yellow vegies allowed and then only a select few. But, looking at that picture – I would be sending that broccoli right to goal myself!

  15. we’re going through a no vegie stage to the extent that the FB will gag if he has to eat any.

    Chocolate as a slimming food? That sounds like a day dream as if it were true I would be the size of Posh Spice

  16. Excellent post! And the comments have me in stitches. ‘Broc-fro’!! LOL, good one Gingajoy.

    And I think Moobs and his wife have a worrying broccoli habit – rehab beckons! However, thanks for ‘fartyflower’ – I reckon my boys will eat anything if I call it that!

  17. I’ve had to endure a going through ‘urgh yuck vegetables no I hate them’ phase for a while – I just liquidise it all and serve it up with pasta or turn it into soup and call it ‘sauce’ And somehow it becomes ‘mmmmm yum’ and gets all eaten up with gusto. Perhaps it is something to do with texture and sort of still wanting to be a bit of a baby?

  18. lqs i used to nibble all the cakey bit from round the side, peel off the jelly bit with the choc, eat the rest of the cake base, then have the jelly (best til last) – i can’t believe i’ve just revealed that! i’ll let you in on my mars bar technique next time …
    moobs that was slightly too much information – i now imagine you both gently tooting your way up the stairs, a bit like in charlie and the chocolate factory (first version – i’m a purist)
    wyndham there’s a useful suggestion above re cauliflower from disgruntled. but broccoli is, surely, the most hardcore of veg – or so the pic would suggest. if dexter is eating broc, he probably doesn’t need anything else? (apart from jaffa cakes and creme eggs)
    disruntled you’re a genius – possibly an evil one – but a genius, nonetheless!
    jacqui i’m impressed by the climate of healthy debate (and eating) in your house. re: guardian – maybe they’re reading this blog … i’ll get back to you re my trilogy theory on your site. x
    paige what does avery make of it? don’t show her the pic, whatever you do …
    nutmeg whatever happened to ‘eat a rainbow?’. and can someone, for the love of god, tell me what indigo is?
    velcro what can you do with a gagging child? my son could never take those vile yellow, slimy antibiotics without heaving. some kids just can’t bear that slimy texture. i did read somewhere (conveniently can’t remember where) that peanut butter helps you lose weight! i know! fantastic, ain’t it? (or was i asleep and dreaming?)
    spymum yes – the power of grossology shouldn’t be underestimated – but i still couldn’t induce my son … and he’s appallingly gross … to eat brussels sprouts, despite the guarantee of jet propulsion for the rest of christmas day!
    lm i agree ‘broc fro’ is pure genius and ginga should be given a blog award – and god knows there are plenty to choose from – for that, immediately!
    emma i agree – he scares me entirely. i may have to give up broccoli rather than face the wrath of mr b!
    rm very cunning! and certainly just as good nutritionally, i spect.

  19. karrie maybe he’s been nibbled by a rampant rabbit! please – what does ‘stat’ mean? it’s the kind of dynamic-sounding us-y type of thing that has we brits cowering bashfully behind our floppy fringes. do share!
    csara hello – this post is proving very fertile (hmm – see next post) for unique phrases – i can say with absolute certainty that no-one has ever invited me to see their cinnamon toast (scary or not), ever before! yours is fantastically evil looking! i presume it’s bezzie mates with my broccoli.

  20. Broccoli is apparently tasty with ketchup – or so my son says.
    But then he thinks everything tastes better with ketchup.
    It’s probably my fault, everything else seems to be.

    Beta Mum

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